“It takes more courage to reveal insecurities than to hide them, more strength to relate to people than to dominate them, more ‘manhood’ to abide by thought-out principles rather than blind reflex. Toughness is in the soul and spirit, not in muscles and an immature mind.”~ Alex Karras
To move forward, know where you are going! I learned the hard way, all that glitters is not gold and every path has a puddle. However, I discovered my puddle was quicksand and I was falling deeper and deeper into a tunnel that had no light at the end of it.
During my time spent on the Transformation.com website, I met a lot of interesting, wonderful and inspiring people that shared my views, shared my thoughts and listened to my woes. Many have become Friends-for- LIFE. I shared many secrets, many emotions and trying times in my life.
I knew I already had a wonderful, loving life but there is always room for improvement so I joined the team and challenged myself in every respect. I gained control of things I felt I had lost, I learned to love unconditionally, and most of all felt I was part of a team to better myself while I gave back to this community and helped others find their happiness.
For a while I was walking blindly and thought I was being led by the light. I attended the 1st Denver Convention and was blinded by the light. Everything was magical and when things seem to be just too good to be true they usually are. In this case, though it took a while, I learned that everything that glitters is not gold.
My journey led me to feel I was a leader, an inspiration to the community, a friend and part of a TEAM. Being a part of a TEAM, being part of something greater than I was, was most important to me. Feeling that I was giving back and helping others made me feel important. This feeling of being important is something I lacked in my own world.
Along the way I stumbled across a few people that I saw as being on this team to get what they could from others, not to give back. They were there to make themselves be looked upon as better than others. The impressions they gave was if you want to be perfect in every way do as I say, I will be your guide. I gave and gave until I felt I couldn’t give anymore and yet I would muster up more energy to give out more compassion whether they deserved it or not.
The more I posted the more I was belittled by the so-called big shots of the team. I was told to stop telling my story, that it was boring and no one benefitted by it. I was told to take my pictures down, that I had too many. Told I had an ego problem. The very program that helped give me the self-confidence and feeling of worth was robbing me of my self-worth.
[One incident in particular upset me] I looked up to a man that belonged to every Body for Life [affiliate and related site] Judge Michael T. Harris. I confided in Mike and he helped me along my journey to overcome my feelings of self-doubt, and introduced me to a self-help Journal by Robert S. McGee “ The Search for Significance”. It was on this journey I really began to see the light and came out of my shell. I felt I had grown up at last and was in control of my own destination.
During this journey my dear friend and mentor Mike Harris passed away. The entire [Body for Life] community mourned and [many] began challenges in the Memory of Mike. I re-posted the Challenge notice on other BFL sites and Facebook. I received many messages saying thanks for letting us know. I posted [this same information] on Bill Phillips Transformation site along with a nice picture of Mike speaking in Tennessee in 2006. I left to go to the gym and when I returned I found this message in my e-mail inbox.
From:forumadmin Date:06-03-10 Subject: post removal
-Soliciting and promoting a challenge to the members of this community that is not affiliated with Transformation.
5. Restrictions on Use. a.The Website is for the personal use by our users and Members only and may not be used in connection with any commercial endeavors. Illegal and/or unauthorized use of the Website, including collecting usernames and/or email addresses of Members by electronic or other means for the purpose of sending unsolicited email or unauthorized framing of or linking to the Website will be investigated, and may result in the termination or cancellation of your access to, or use of, the Website. Commercial advertisements, affiliate links, and other forms of solicitation may be removed from Member profiles without notice and may result in termination of membership privileges. Legal action may be taken by us for any illegal or unauthorized use of the Website. i. Involves the transmission of “junk mail,” “chain letters,” “pyramid schemes,” “spam,” or any other form of unsolicited mass mailing, or involves self-promotion and commercial solicitation. The purpose and intention of this Website is to provide support, encouragement and help for one another, at no charge and no expense to our users
While we appreciate the spirit in which this is meant; the only challenges that can be offered on the site are through transformation.
We appreciate your membership and valuable contributions to this community. Thank you for cooperation and understanding in this matter.
We wish you well and healing in your time of loss.
Needless to say I was saddened and shocked. This was outside of their terms and conditions, but that this post would be removed and not accepted for consideration because of the nature of the content. This wasn’t just “Soliciting and promoting a challenge to the members of there community that was not affiliated with Transformation.” Any fool could plainly see it as an act of kindness, a challenge to be done in the honor of Mike Harris. Mike was also involved as a member of Transformation. How sad that Transformation could not honor the man that has changed peoples lives and mentored them.
Rules may be rules, but there are exceptions to any rule, and rules were meant to be broken. It just really really saddens me when rules dominate over compassion and common sense.
What happened to being the change?
While they said “we appreciate the spirit in which this is meant; the only challenges that can be offered on the site are through transformation, and We appreciate your membership and valuable contributions to this community. Thank you for cooperation and understanding in this matter.“ I felt very unappreciated and felt [this was] a stab in the back to Mike Harris.
This was what I thought was the last straw until I received a string of e-mail’s from a Transformation Champion that I thought was a friend. In trying to make a long story short, someone asked the reason I wasn’t on Transformation. I responded and was blasted and told someone they knew was furious when I posted [a comment] on my Facebook page. They copied that and sent it to Bill Phillips when it happened. My friend claims to have been asked about it. [She was then told] “ Linda wonders why she wasn’t named a champion. Bill saw through her BS all along, she doesn’t get it, never has, never will and [Linda] will always continue to try and hurt others.”
[I was then asked why] if I said I wasn’t coming back, didn’t like Bill or the site , then why was I logged in [to Transformation]? It was always my understanding that people were welcome to come and go. No questions asked. I was coming and going and trying to STOP and think and plan and know exactly what was waiting at the end of my path. I was tired of walking around blindly. [Leaving] was not as simple as putting one foot in front of the other.
I have always believed that everything, good or bad, happens for a reason. I believe these hurt feelings and harsh words was a blessing in disguise. I was able to let go and rid myself of the pain, stagger my way from the darkness and into the light to find that no matter how hard or how long I search everything I need is, and has always been, right here in my own back yard.
In order to move forward and continue on your journey you must sometimes STOP and think and plan and know exactly what is waiting at the end of your path. You can’t just continue to walk blindly. It’s not as simple as putting one foot in front of the other. You must know where the path leads.
To move forward, know where you are going!
In the Spirit of Body-for-LIFE,
Your BFL Cheerleader
GET HER DONE LINDA
Linda Ann Smith
Note: For purposes of readability and clarity, the content of this post has been edited. Linda has a very distinctive writing style and we wanted to preserve that.